snow

i woke up today to a series of love letters.

Not for me.

It was a series of love letters written by a woman to a man who never loved her back. The words were so poignant i couldn't help but be in awe. How she felt so strongly for the person amazed me and made me remember things i have already hidden.

Of unrequited love. Hers was a story of love not being returned. But what of love that was felt so strongly and yet the protagonists in the story never really belonged to each other, as much as they defied fate? When you bare and give your soul to someone, do you really get it back? What if yesterday and today decided to fight and you are the judge, would you be able to make a decision? Would it even matter?

Too much tv soaps.

Is the present a reality only because the past decided not to play a role in it? What if there's an insurrection for your affection?

Argh. Ang hirap.

To have someone in your life who was the object of such love is unnerving. You feel inadequate. And you think about that someone as well who taught you to look up at Orion and hope, who inspired you to write, who was the shoulder you leaned on... Northern star. Always will be the northern star.

Ang tagal na nun. Wala na yun. Sabay taas balikat. Kalimutan na natin.

Why? Why forget?

Gutom na siguro ako. Ang daming niebe dito.