My soap

For the past week, I’ve been frequenting the wake of my nephew Neil. On the last day of his wake in Manila, I volunteered to stay all day long and take care of the children (Neil’s siblings) while their parents packed for their departure the next day. I served breakfast and when lunch time came, I ordered Jollibee and stuffed my nieces like crazy.

When it was time for siesta, I positioned myself in front of the casket. I picked out the bench near it and used an old book for a pillow. Who was that man you called from the dead Big J? Lazarus right? I mused over the fact that I know some people who could bring the dead back to life. I could do that, with drugs of course and the proper timing. Not with someone who had been dead for several days. What if Big J tells me to call out my nephew from the dead? Nah. But what if? Well one thing is for sure, that will be the end of my medical career. Anyways, I had a good cry. I never cry publicly if I can help it. Since I was alone, I could stop pretending and just shed those tears. I missed him but I am comforted by the fact that I know he is in heaven, laughing over his new fat crib. Big J, when my time comes, do give me high speed internet inside my crib.

*
Whenever people ask me to tell them stories about my life, I tell them, “There’s nothing interesting to tell.” And I get this stare from them – dish it out cheen. True. I have lots of interesting stories. I just don’t want to be an open book. Take this blog for example, here I control what I tell. The stories I do not write about, I could sell them to ABS CBN so they could make their own version of Days of Our Lives.

Without going into details, the characters in my soap would be the following: an ex guerilla, a philandering husband, an ex convict, a drug lord, a forsaken son, an unforgiving mother, a politician harboring homosexual tendencies, a delusional man, etc. And it would have those elements of power, greed, sex, adultery, lies, betrayal, redemption, deception, plots to overthrow someone, gun pointing, dirty politics, underground world dealings, church hypocrisy, finding meaning in chaos, and yes, even those dramatic get down on your knees and beg for mercy sort of stuff. Thank God I’m made of stronger stuff to not be affected or at the very least play the role of the pacifier in the twisted conflicts between the people I know and love. If you want simple, uncomplicated life, don’t turn to me. Soap opera’s don’t have anything on the life I’ve known. Do I hate such kind of life? No. I am amused by it. Continually being challenged by it, it gives me something to talk about with Big J. I just don’t talk about it with many people, they’ve got the television for that.

*
And to my cousin Leilani who is reading this, rock on! I am deeply sorry I missed that one night of volcanic eruption.