Nike

I mused about my going away party over lunch at some french cafe. If i were to have my one last lunch it would be at that cafe. It was a bit overpriced, but whenever things went crazy during medical school, their food was a source of comfort for me.
The party was crazy as there were a lot of people, but it was good because I got to see my friends, my treasures. Each time i look into their faces, I see a part of myself. The things I used to like, the person I was, the person I am, the person I will be - all etched in their smiles. It was all good. It's sad that I will be leaving them, but i know i could never lose them. I was looking at the people walking outside the cafe. For a split second i felt as if a legion of butterflies found solace in my stomach. It was weird. This was it. I'm leaving. Chapter one finished. On with the next chapter. New everything. But then it was for a split second. Big J reminded me that no matter how hard I tried, I could never never be alone. He looked after me when no one could, when no one would, when no one should. He made sure my steps were secure, and He will make sure that I will be taken cared of, just like he did to that shepherd boy, to that guy who parted the sea, to that boy with the colorful coat.

It's been a good life, i think. Marked mostly by grace to this bad kid.

I stand in awe, always.

I don't deserve this, but that is how Big J works.

*
Oddly enough, I'm not nervous. You'd think that starting all over should make me barf every now and then. But there's this peace I cannot explain. A peace only Big J could give. I've seen Him move miraculously in my life - money from nowhere, favor unexpected, problems solved, love unconditional, streams in the desert and all that jazz. It's all true.

*

I used to subscribe to the belief that if you use both your heart and mind in making a decision, everything will turn out alright. I'm making a retraction. It brought me somewhere, but following Big J, brought me to places I've never dreamed of. It's the greatest adventure i tell you. You just have to go against the belief of self reliance. I could only go so far. But Big J? Hey, he beats Superman anytime.

*

So I am four days away from flying. It will be sad i won't get to see Chiz Escudero take oath. OR joker arroyo. I won't get to see Kuya Kim and all his whatever animals. I'll be moving into an apartment, getting a car and familiarizing myself in a place Big J told me to go. All i know is that Big J said go to this place. So well, I'm off.

Aren't you sad you are leaving your life behind? Asked a friend.

Life? My life is this - that I obey Big J. BIg J will take care of the things I will be leaving behind.

I just have to do this.